I sit here - after almost a month since our last post - and I think about the most incredible and intensely emotional period that our family has just experienced. My daughter is 8 1/2 months old and, as of today, has spent the last 4 fighting leukemia. The first three months were inpatient. This past month has been at home with daily outpatient care. And this past month has been so amazing that it is almost enough to make me forget the first three.
On Monday, January 3, 2011, we will be readmitted to Lucile Packard Children's Hospital to the Bone Marrow Stem Cell Transplant Unit.
All I can think of - the only thing I can think of - is the lyric from Les Miserables:
I am frozen in a state of anticipation. We are either at the brink of the end of our fight against cancer, or we are at the brink of the end. I don't know how to anticipate anything other than bringing her home in 5-7 weeks from today. This assumes that all goes well with her transplant and that her immune systems safely begins establishing itself within that timeframe. But, I still fear - with a cold reality that it feels like no one else could ever know - that this could all go horribly wrong in what will seem all too quickly. And then, all I can think of is the plea:
3 comments:
We are praying for your family, and I'm sure you have cherished this time with her. I hope y'all had a Merry Christmas, and here's to a better year in 2011!!!
I have tried to imagine the emotions you must endure right now. Be brave. You have everything you need for this battle and you are not fighting alone. Remember how well that tiny "Bug" of yours has proved herself a resilient fighter. God gave her that and more. I personally feel a very real peace that all will end well. I love you!
My first prayer: that she/you get through it with flying colors.
My second prayer: that she comes out of it with an adamantium skeleton. Could be a long shot though. Fingers crossed! Love you all.
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